Insomniac

Endless nights
Awake and confused
Laying here
Mentally abused
I think the thoughts
Has taken me away
From what's really
Making me stray
From my sleep
And restful nights
Should I speak
On what might
Just make you look at me
In a way you wouldn't
Want to see
But what do I care
If you thought that I'd bare
With the ideas
Of you human nightmares
Flashing back to the time
Of when I could only cry
Before I was who I am
Before I could barely stand
To face my pain
And the hurt
Yes I remember
Everything
Even the cuts
The razors
The knifes
The questions
The wonders
The why's
Blood running down
Dripping to the ground
Ripping my skin
Until I finally gave in
Closed my eyes
In a sense of relief
Passing out in a deep
Unconches state of mind
An on going saga
I felt would never die
Deep breaths
"Yo open your eyes"
My ex screamed
As she frustratedly cried
Held me up
Bloody and all
Laying here
Against my bedroom wall
This wasn't the first time
Nor the worst time
Just another night
In this fucking world
"Kill me now"
I sweared and curled
Up in bed eyes open
Body dead
Thinking still
As it lead
Back to
The blood shed
Hospital bed
My girl left me
Is what letter read
Fuck her I guess
So young and troubled
Stitched up and leveled
Back to my bed
Once again
What to do
How to win?
Years later
The cuts disappear
Behind the tattoos
That are now art
A cover up was just the start
Now I'm addicted to the pain
I've finally replaced my knife
May have saved my life
Still can't sleep
But the weed helps keep
My mind off the strain
Of my Insomniac brain. .